Divorce Attorney – How to Choose the Correct One

Divorce is one of the most traumatic experiences that you can go through.  It has been compared to the loss of a child or life partner. No matter how amicable the divorce is, there is pain, sadness and the sense of failure, which is traumatising for most people.  The key to choosing the right Divorce Attorney is not to look for the cheapest or the most cut-throat, as most movies would have you believe.  Here are 6 aspects to consider when choosing the right Divorce Attorney.

1. Ask for a Referral

Most of our new clients come to us through word of mouth or from our positive Google reviews.  Ask your friends and family what their experience has been with a Divorce Attorney and consider their experience when deciding. 

2. Personal Compatibility

You need to remember that what is right for one person may or may not be right for you.  So, referrals are a great starting point, but you need to ensure that you feel comfortable working with your Divorce Attorney.   It will never be a painless experience but feeling cared for will help you navigate this difficult time.

3. Consider the Divorce Attorney’s Soft Skills

Being skilled in divorce law is not the only thing that you need to look for when choosing a Divorce Attorney.  Here is a list of soft skills to look for in a Divorce Attorney:

  • Able to listen to what you are and are not saying.
  • Discreet with the information shared with him or her.
  • Mindful of your financial situation and keep it within your budget.
  • Respectful to both you and your spouse.
  • Keep the welfare of your children as his/her top priority.

4. Determine your Budget

There are various things that you can do to ensure you don’t waste money while making use of your Divorce Attorney.  Here are some tips:

  • Do not call to speak to your attorney unless necessary.
  • Rather speak to the receptionist, secretary or paralegal if the matter can be addressed by them.
  • Keep casual chit-chat to a minimum when conversing with your Divorce Attorney.
  • Come to an informal agreement on terms with your spouse regarding care and contact, child and spousal maintenance and the division of property and assets.
  • Ensure that you don’t hand your Divorce Attorney documents that will need to be organized by the office staff.

5. Ensure that your Divorce Attorney is Firm when they Need to be

While you’ll be looking for a Divorce Attorney with soft skills, you need to also ensure that your attorney can be firm when he or she needs to be.  Divorce is emotional, which often leads to hurtful things being said and done, and unfair demands being made.  This is where you need an attorney to be firm, either on your behalf or with you.  The law regarding people’s rights needs to be kept in mind during disputes, where emotional decisions are being made. 

6. Ensure that these things are not seen in your Divorce Attorney

We’ve discussed the things you want to see in a Divorce Attorney, but we have not discussed the things that you do NOT want to see.  Here are the traits to view as ‘red flags’, which we recommend you stay clear from:

  • Unfamiliar with law updates.
  • Unethical
  • Doesn’t care about your personal wellbeing.
  • Over-charges for services.
  • Criticizes his/her colleagues.
  • Tells you just what you want to hear rather than prepare you for all the possible outcomes.
  • Inexperienced in handling divorce cases.


The Divorce Attorneys at Van Heerdens Attorneys have the most up-to-date legal expertise, as well as the people skills required to ensure that your divorce runs as smoothly as possible.

Do you have a matter which you would like to discuss?

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